Fathers Facing Extinction

Psalm 12:1

June 16, 2013 AM – Father’s Day

Pastor Craig Ledbetter

Bible Baptist Church, Ballincollig, Cork, Ireland



I.       Introduction (Psalm 12:1)


A.      There is an extinction taking place that is terrifying!


1.      The Dodo Bird is already extinct

2.      As is The Woolly Mammoth

3.      And The Sabre toothed Tiger

4.      And The Tyrannosaurus Rex!

5.      No. An animal for more important is headed for extinction…

6.      Fathers!


B.      There is no shortage of “males” in the population


1.      As a matter of fact, the world is made up of 51% men and 49% women

2.      In Ireland right now, it is 54% to 46%

3.      Plenty of guys to go around


C.      But “Godly men”; “faithful men”, honourable men are hard to find, AND the ones that are around, are disappearing fast!


1.      And the whole world is suffering for it!

2.      Children who grow up without a father, grow up in an unstable home. With the mother working to provide for herself and her children she has little time to teach or raise the children. The Day Care centre or baby sitter becomes the greater influence in their child's life. And the vicious cycle of ruin continues!


D.     It has happened at different times throughout history


1.      It happened in Noah’s day – he was the only godly man around

2.      It was happening in David’s day (when Psalm 12 was written) – men whom he could count on to be godly, and honest and faithful, were quitting, and dropping out all around him!

3.      It worried David – listen again to his words, “Help, LORD; for the godly man ceaseth; for the faithful fail from among the children of men.”

4.      Just as it should worry US!


E.      The world doesn’t just need more “Dad’s” but godly, faithful ones!


II.    Background


A.      God's plan for the training of children is in the TWO parent family, with BOTH husband and wife present, both taking the role of an example to the child.


1.      We live in the new enlightened age where the role of the family is being redefined.


a.       Today it is a single parent family,

b.      Or Same sex parents

c.       Or children raised by their grand parents while mom and dad go their separate selfish ways.

d.      Enlightened my foot!


2.      Children are designed to be taught by their parents – plural – by their mother AND father. They are the role models that children follow when they grow to adulthood. God says for PARENTS to "train up and child in the way he should go…"

3.      Both the mother and father are equally needed to show the child the proper way for them to live.

4.      Both boys and girls need a father in the home to set the example.


a.       Boys learn to be men from their fathers, how to treat their wives, the responsibility to make a living, etc.

b.      Girls learn too how to what a man should be and how to choose their husbands.

c.       The children watch their parents and learn from them how they should respond to their future husbands and wives.


5.      Sadly, where there is no father or good relationship between the parents, a destructive pattern is set that most children will follow in their marriages and relationships. The roots of epidemic divorce AND homosexuality in our society can be traced to this failure of mothers and fathers to work together.


B.      It has never been easy to be a parent; especially being a Father! Note what the Bible says on the matter (we know it has never been easy being a godly Mom – same with a godly Dad):


1.      We fathers are supposed to Train UP our children – to a higher level than the world around you! Don’t leave it to your wife alone, or to the school, or even the church!


a.       "Train up a child in the way he should go: and when he is old, he will not depart from it." (Proverbs 22:6)

b.      "And, ye fathers, provoke not your children to wrath: but bring them up in the nurture and admonition of the Lord." (Ephesians 6:4)


2.      Discipline and correct your children – don’t just let them do as they please! "Correct thy son, and he shall give thee rest; yea, he shall give delight unto thy soul." (Proverbs 29:17)

3.      Be in charge of your home! “For I know him, that he will command his children and his household after him, and they shall keep the way of the LORD, to do justice and judgment...” (Gen 18:19)

4.      Serve the Lord God as a family – Don’t live to serve your boss, or your little woman, or your pet sport! “And if it seem evil unto you to serve the LORD, choose you this day whom ye will serve; … but as for me and my house (Joshua, the DAD is talking), we will serve the LORD.” (Jos 24:15)  

5.      Worship and obey God! "Thou shalt keep therefore his statutes, and his commandments, which I command thee this day, that it may go well with thee, and with thy children after thee, and that thou mayest prolong thy days upon the earth, which the LORD thy God giveth thee, for ever." (Deuteronomy 4:40)

6.      Stay with your wife and family – through every storm! “For the LORD, the God of Israel, saith that he hateth putting away (divorce).” (Mal 2:16). Don’t ever abandon what God gave you in your family!

7.      And still work and pay all the bills and hold things together!  But if any provide not for his own, and specially for those of his own house, he hath denied the faith, and is worse than an infidel.” (1Tim 5:8)


C.      Society and our western culture has demoted fatherhood to that of a dork, a drunk, a hot head, or a wimp!


1.      Girls only give attention to the most vile and obnoxious guys

2.      Seek to have guys as docile as possible – never getting their fingers dirty and never risking their lives for anything

3.      Promote a woman’s body constantly so that boys think girls are only a sex object

4.      Its shows only extremes of men on TV and in movies –


a.       Ones who have no families – only sex partners – like James Bond

b.      Ones who are stupid and worthless like Homer Simpson




D.     It is getting harder and harder to be a godly, faithful father in this world!


E.      How Did This Happen?


1.      Men got used to living without God (Psalm 14:1) believing that there is no god, or that He just doesn’t matter anymore!


a.       Men have been convinced that they can be good and do well without God in their lives!

b.      But the absolute truth is, Men cannot be good without God

c.       Not talking about religion (even though at least that helps people be moral), but talking about the Creator God!


1)     Modern men need to know Him

2)     Read His words, every day – like we eat breakfast, lunch and supper

3)     Learn of Him – Jesus said, “Follow me!” “Learn of me!”

4)     Praying and begging God for wisdom, and for the needs that he himself cannot supply for his family


d.      Unless you men make the effort to WALK with God, live each day conscious of God’s presence, and obedient to God’s will, then you will fail this generation, just as your father failed the last!


2.      Men have been taught that life is all about THEM, and not others. It’s all about THINGS and pleasures and selfishness now!


a.       Luk 12:15  And he said unto them, Take heed, and beware of covetousness: for a man's life consisteth not in the abundance of the things which he possesseth.”

b.      Unhappy men abound – depression because they don’t HAVE things

c.       No sacrificial faithfulness to a cause or to an ideal anymore

d.      We have several generations of selfish quitters who are never happy because life didn’t turn out like they wanted! Boo hoo!


3.      Men stopped having Biblical convictions / no real limits on their lives – believe limits are wrong!


a.       Dad’s are supposed to have limits – not just on them, but upon those in their family as well

b.      Modern men say…


1)     If it is legal, then no one should stop me for doing what I want

2)     AND, if I want to do something, and I don’t think it is wrong, then I should be allowed to just go ahead and do it anyway


c.       Convictions are beliefs about right and wrong that we will not cross – that we will not ignore

d.      Modern men now just act and live like the world they are surrounded by


1)     They no longer influence the world around them

2)     But instead are moulded by the world’s pressures


e.       Conformed to the world – the pressure of the world shapes these guys into wearing


1)     Earrings and piercings

2)     Tattoos

3)     Goatees

4)     Trashed looking

5)     Wimpy looking


f.        Pressures have caused fathers to not control the music in their home, the TV, the TV’s in the rooms, the friends, the attitudes…

g.       So, because sin just grows and grows, love in the home actually dies (Mt 24:12)


4.      Fatigue due to Multiple attacks against them and their home


a.       There is a unified effort to systematically destroy your home!

b.      There are vicious attacks from Outside the home


1)     The culture – ever changing world – new questions and ideas about what is acceptable

2)     Bills and debts constantly coming at us

3)     The economy pulling everyone down


c.       From within the home

1)     Arguing – unhappiness - strife

2)     Resentments

3)     Regrets

4)     Carnality - apathy


d.      From hell itself


1)     Spiritual attacks

2)     Demonic attacks


e.       Men are worn out from all the fighting (2Cor 11:29)


5.      Fatherhood suffers! Godly, faithful, honourable fatherhood!

6.      And so our homes suffer – listen to the testimony of someone writing about how much they hate Father’s Day:


 “I think that there should be ANTI Fathers Day cards because I am sick to death of all the sappy cards showing kids with these UNREAL representations of fathers - not like any father I EVER had. Some fathers do not deserve to be called anything more than a SPERM DONOR. They create families - leave/divorce - without care for the deep emotional damage it inflicts - then they go and create new families – [LYING] to all of their new friends and DENY[ING] the fact that you are their children. Hallmark makes me feel sick & inadequate around Father's Day - because I did not get a Hallmark Father! Not all fathers play ball with you - some may have beat you - some may have ignored you - some even deny you! Where is the REALITY BASED CARDS for these jokers? There are plenty of them out there - Hallmark would make a BILLION dollars on this genre of card. "Crappy Fathers Day …  - Thanks for abandoning our family & my brothers & sisters so you could go sow your wild oats & marry a younger woman! Glad that you never remember my birthday & say that you only have ONE child when you have fathered FOUR!! YOU are the typical … DAD - not the Hallmark [kind]." That is what my Fathers Day card would say! Alas, we live in a fantasy, dream land where every father wants & loves ALL of his children he brought onto this Earth. No one would have the [guts] to put out a card that speaks the truth about 50%+ of the male … population that have psychologically scarred over 50% of the children in this country !! Congrats if you have a Hallmark Father - realize that you are in the minority!”


F.      God has a way to reverse the decline. Try any other way, and it will fail! Try things God’s way, and countless generations can be saved!


III. Message - Stopping the Inevitable Decline – Saving the Species


A.      Personal Repentance – starting over again (Prov 28:13; 2Chron 7:14)


1.      And all men need to spend SERIOUS time alone with God, personally repenting of all our failures as Dads

2.      Men look to other men too much – comparing ourselves amongst ourselves

3.      We need to turn back to God – humble ourselves before Him

4.      It will be a constant effort of humbling ourselves before God, and begging of God to help us get back what we have lost!

5.      Make the effort to start over with God every day. He starts over with YOU!

6.      A lot of men have only had religion all their lives. Never had any real encounter with God, and definitely have no fear of God!

7.      Yet Acts 17:30  declares, “And the times of this ignorance God winked at; but now commandeth all men every where to repent.”

8.      All men need to be born again. Are YOU saved from the wrath to come?

9.      If you are, then it should show by your softness towards GOD and His words!

10.  If you are NOT, then today you need to repent and get born again!


B.      Stand Your Ground – no more compromises with the world’s culture


1.      Be men again!


a.       That means show some determination – put on some PANTS!

b.      Make some decisions about your home – what it is going to be like

c.       Quit quitting! 1Cor 16:13  Watch ye, stand fast in the faith, quit you like men (that means FINISH LIKE A MAN), be strong.”

d.      Ladies, leave your man alone for a while! Let him lead! Help him lead! Pray for him instead of slamming him!


2.      Go ahead and be peculiar (2Peter 2:9) – strange looking to the world


a.       The world will mock a man who starts over and gets saved and has his sins forgiven by faith in Jesus Christ.

b.      The world in scorn proclaims a man who seeks God is “weak” and afraid. What utter foolishness is the wisdom of the world, who say it is a sign of weakness to believe truth and be in fellowship with the God who created us!

c.       Was Christ weak? He showed such love for the mankind that He suffered for our sins that we might have forgiveness and eternal life!

d.      What a perverted view the world has of what is a real man.


1)     They praise the selfish, immoral father who has sold his soul to living the "gusto life," who shirks is responsibility to his wife and children.

2)     They then ridicule and make fun of the father who shoulders his responsibility, boldly proclaims his love and devotion to God and to his wife and children. What sick and perverted idea most men have.


3.      Get some convictions! Biblical convictions:


a.       Like what you will watch and not watch!


1)     Psalm 101:3 I will set no wicked thing before mine eyes: I hate the work of them that turn aside; it shall not cleave to me.

2)     Job 31:1  I made a covenant with mine eyes; why then should I think upon a maid? (A “maid” is a young lady who is not your wife)

3)     Mat 5:28  But I say unto you, That whosoever looketh on a woman to lust after her hath committed adultery with her already in his heart.


b.      Like who your friends are going to be


1)     Psa 26:4  I have not sat with vain persons, neither will I go in with dissemblers (liars).

2)     Psa 26:5  I have hated the congregation of evil doers; and will not sit with the wicked.

3)     Psa_122:1  I was glad when they said unto me, Let us go into the house of the LORD.


c.       Like what you will ever allow your mouth to say! Psa 39:1 I said, I will take heed to my ways, that I sin not with my tongue: I will keep my mouth with a bridle, while the wicked is before me.

d.      Like, that you will not even LOOK at a glass of wine or a beer! Pro 23:31  Look not thou upon the wine when it is red, when it giveth his colour in the cup, when it moveth itself aright.

e.       Like what you will do on a Sunday, EVERY Sunday! Heb 10:25 Not forsaking the assembling of ourselves together, as the manner of some is; but exhorting one another: and so much the more, as ye see the day approaching.


C.      Fight the Right Fights (Eph 6:12)


1.      Most men are fighting all the wrong fights. Caught up in fights with the very people he wants to love and protect.

2.      God says we are to “fight the GOOD fight!

3.      Fight the Spiritual fights – wrestling against stronger powers than you can imagine. Jas_4:7  Submit yourselves therefore to God. Resist the devil, and he will flee from you.

4.      Fight for the heart of your family! Don’t let the world win! Don’t let sin win. Don’t let the devil win!

5.      Fight to stay balanced – hardest part – work hard at it


a.       You HAVE to work

b.      You need to sleep

c.       You need to have time to yourself and hobbies and sports

d.      BUT you HAVE to be godly, and faithful, and present in the home to make the difference!

e.       Make time just for your wife

f.        Make time to train your children and grandchildren

g.       Make time for God

h.      Don’t let anything in this world put you out of balance!

i.         It is THAT important!


D.     Encourage yourself in the Lord (1Sam 30:6)


1.      Your wife may not encourage you – shame on you ladies!

2.      Your children may not ever care what you are trying to do for them

3.      People may abandon you – and they will

4.      But the Lord is there, ready to strengthen, ready to use you to do the impossible

5.      Remind yourself just how worthy the Lord Jesus is of your efforts

6.      Remember how powerful HE is

7.      Believe that he is working everything out for good!


E.      Pray like you haven’t in a long time! (LukE 18:1)  And he spake a parable unto them to this end, that men ought always to pray, and not to faint;


1.      That was what David was doing in Psalm 12!

2.      Pray for wisdom

3.      Pray for courage

4.      Pray for your sons and your daughters

5.      Pray for your wife

6.      Pray against the devil

7.      Pray for victory and success against the devil’s work

8.      Be praying men!


F.      Ignore what’s happening right now – trust God to make it all work out – if you will just do what YOU are supposed to do. That goes for you wives too!


1.      Faith is doing what is right to do, and leaving the results up to God

2.      Do you not believe God enough to just stay at doing the right things?

3.      Ignore the fact that doing right doesn’t seem to be working in your favour right now

4.      Just trust in the Lord still, with all thine heart!

5.      That’s real, biblical, steadfast faith!

6.      And we men need a good does of it!


IV.  Conclusion


A.      There is a Remnant of godly men – there are still some around today!

B.      But, what if they continue to disappear? What will be left in 10 years?


1.      More kids raised without their father – stands at almost 20% of all children have no father at home! That is nearly 1 out of 5! How far do you want that to go on?

2.      We will have another generation that does not know God!

3.      A generation that is full of LIARS

4.      Thieves

5.      Brutal animals that aren’t even human, and they are proud of it

6.      Homosexuals and Lesbians rampant

7.      Feminists, angry at men when they never grow up

8.      More Drunkards

9.      More Drug addicts

10.  Is THAT what you want for your daughters, and for your grandchildren?


C.      We all need to protect the ideal of a godly man. We need to honour Biblical fatherhood, and manliness, and faithfulness


1.      Yes, we will be odd to the world

2.      We will be seen as going backwards

3.      But we will have our homes back and our children back, and best of all, we will have God back in our society!


D.     How can any one of us men do it?


1.      By Personal Repentance

2.      By Standing Your Ground

3.      By Fighting the Right Fights

4.      By Encouraging yourself in the Lord

5.      By Praying like you haven’t in a long time!

6.      By Ignoring what’s happening right now – trust God to make it all work out